EP046: Alissa Daire Nelson on switching guilt for gratitude and moving from fear to freedom

Alissa Daire Nelson is a modern-day superwoman, but not in the way that term is usually used. She is bold and courageous, she takes space when she needs it and models for her girls what it looks like when a woman – who happens to be a mother – follows her dreams and asks for support from her family to get there.

I loved learning about Alissa’s early lesson that as parents, we often resort to using our anger and our power (vocal, physical or otherwise) to control situations with our kids that trigger us, and what she chose to do instead.

Alissa decided years ago to draw on this quote from Scream-Free Parenting as her guide: “we are not responsible FOR our children, we are responsible TO them.” That sentence has shaped how she, her ex-husband and her current (and last!) husband parent their two girls.

Taking radical responsibility for and to herself has meant many conversations and reckonings when things have gone sideways, which in turn has given Alissa’s teen girls permission to mess up and make up, knowing they always have a voice and that they’ll be heard.

Alissa talks about how her girls are the best of friends and shares how asking good questions about when things go well has helped the whole family focus on the positive by choosing to engage in positive behaviours rather than harp on the negative when it arises.

It’s fascinating to hear how Alissa and her co-parenting team manage their daughter’s potentially life-threatening chronic illness and how they’ve used practical solutions to empower both of their girls in all aspects of life.

There’s so much richness in this week’s episode, so be sure to listen all the way to the end and then join the conversation over in the MamaFuel Virtual Village, our free group on Facebook where the discussion deepens every week. 

If you’d like to check out Alissa here and on Instagram here.

You can watch the video of the call here.